well pronounced to even the tightest
of closed eyes, I stayed awake all last night
looking for you, asking myself
if I were in love with me, where would I hide?

I pulled on my newest dress and my tallest shoes
and scoured the streets, stopping men, women,
diseased stray cats, interrogating them
on their devotion to me, how I made them feel
and if they’d really go so far as to die for me,
for now.

I dialed random number strings and whispered
                        is this you?
but you kept pretending you didn’t recognize
my voice, or just refused to answer at all.

I stayed awake all last night looking for you,
asking myself, if I were in love with me
where would I go to hide?

I’m so tired; I guess that means you really
just don’t want to be found.